The Art of Letting Go of Attachments

The Art of Letting Go of Attachments
By: Antonio Stephens, Wellness Coach

Learning to let go of your self-attachments is one of the most important steps and keys to your own liberation. 

We all have these ideas and thoughts that shape our identity and perception of self. These are thoughts that we cling to about what and who we are. Some of these often come with shame, sadness, guilt, or fear which we tend to hide behind and dim our light. 

I’ve been there.

For many, attachments are formed in early childhood and stem from trauma or memorable instances that had a significant impact on our lives and how we see ourselves. For me, as an immigrant child, this was my mother leaving my brother and I at a very young age to come to the United States from Jamaica to seek better opportunities. My biological father walking out and away from us then too, and I’ve covered this in previous articles, but everything that came with figuring out my identity and sexuality as a Black queer man. 

Understand this, by claiming your presence and authentic power you can dissolve and liberate your attachments, which will in turn help you to live a life that truly shines. 

Looking for a place to start? Here are a few tools and insights you can begin leveraging today. Recognize that these mechanisms require practice and consistency before you begin seeing their benefits. 

Shining a Light on the Dark Places 

The things you’ve submerged to the depths of your subconscious or have neglected for years, because of fear of the pain they may cause or how people may perceive you, are actually your greatest opportunities to grow and flourish. We all have these places within us. You can learn to work with them. You’ll be surprised at what they can teach you. As you explore, practice self-compassion and give yourself grace. 

Journaling about whatever comes to surface is a great place to start. It may also be helpful to work with a therapist or medical professional that can help you organize and reframe your thoughts in a productive manner.  

Learning to Quiet the Mind and Opening Your Heart 

Like any machine or piece of equipment, our minds are powerful tools that require on-going maintenance and fine tuning to ensure we operate optimally. Learning to quiet your mind is one of the greatest practices. By indulging in the practice, you can become a master at releasing attachments – letting the phenomenon of life arise, exist and change while you remain present. Practicing or adding daily routines such as mediation, physical exercise, listening to music or hatha yoga could be very beneficial to you. The more spaciousness and presence you create within yourself, you’ll get to a place where you can begin to love everything just the way it is – recognizing that this is all a manifestation of the divine.  

Choosing Yourself, First and Always 

To choose yourself first means leading and expressing a life that works best for you. It means embracing the totality of who you are and what makes you uniquely YOU. It’s okay to disappoint others, but never disappoint or abandon yourself to make others happy. This is so important in claiming your authentic power and liberation. What you’ll come to learn is the more you say yes to the things you’ve deemed critical and important in helping you be at your best, the closer you get to the never ending magical unfolding of self or the core of who you really are.   

Repeat after me: I know who I am, I know what I am, I know how I serve. I am here, I am here, I am here. 

Claim your presence today! 

Thanks and talk to you again soon. 


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